Trash Squad Day 1 - GAME START

[chinhotta]

[ Maybe you were going about your business and blacked out, maybe you were dead. Either way, when you come to, you are in what looks like the entrance hall to a school, except for the very well secured front door. Before you can really get your bearings, a voice rings out on an the intercom. ]

Welcome, kiddos! —How does that sound? 'Kiddos'? Too daddy kink? Eh, let's go with it for now. Anyway, welcome to a once-in-a-lifetime chance at romance and passion, with fabulous prizes! Find love beyond the boundaries of time and space! Original concept, do not steal.

Pick up your tablets and get settled in! A little later today, we'll have our first heart-pounding get-to-know-you event!

—Oh, also, no violence allowed! I know some of you kids are into the murder thing, but that's not the kind of game we're running here.

[ In fact, there are several boxes of electronic tablets around the room. When you pick one up, it displays the gameplay and rules.]

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Game navigation

Comments

[liftoft]

No kidding... and for something this tacky. Don't get wrong, going on dates and all can be kinda fun, but it shouldn't really be done like this...

[purrtagonist]

Of course not. For starters, one should be given the opportunity to say no.

[casually scrollin' scrollin' through the tablet as he talks, yup]

[liftoft]

Sure--I guess you could still say no to a date, but I don't really wanna know what happens if you end up 'eliminated' for not having one...

[purrtagonist]

They did promise us there wouldn't be any murder.

[said wryly. but, like, can you really trust a chinchilla?]

But whatever it is, I don't imagine it'll be pleasant.

[liftoft]

I guess... even if it's not bad, nobody really wants to be the guy who's sent home 'cause he couldn't get a date, right?

[purrtagonist]

Eh. . .

[Akira's pride isn't so brittle as to be affected by something like that, so he just shrugs]

I'm less worried about the "whys" of being eliminated and more worried about this "romantic getaway."

[he even does air quotes. to emphasize how dubious he is of this concept]

[liftoft]

True... what do chinchillas even think is romantic, anyway?

[purrtagonist]

Exercise wheels and sawdust.

[liftoft]

Hehe--I dunno, sounds cozy!

[purrtagonist]

[a huffed laugh]

Maybe we should be checking to make sure you're not part chinchilla.

[liftoft]

[ That does make him falter a little, going huffy--though his voice comes out more petulant than actually annoyed ]

O-Oi... I already got accused of bein' in on this thing with them once already. I dunno how else to say I don't have anything to do with this...!

[purrtagonist]

[Akira grins, eyes sparking with mischief]

Present your official Dating Game Membership Card to the next person you speak with?

[there is no official Dating Game Membership Card]

[liftoft]

W-Wait, there's a membership card?!

[purrtagonist]

[tsk tsk]

You may want to find a replacement card before you get caught without one.

[liftoft]

Th-- the rules didn't say anything about a card! They can't throw in last minute conditions like that!

[purrtagonist]

[AKIRA'S A LITTLE SHIT. but also not one to milk things for longer than necessary]

You realize I'm kidding, right?

[liftoft]

--S-Seriously?! Shit, man, I was really worried for a second!

[purrtagonist]

I could tell. Sorry, sorry. I couldn't resist.

[liftoft]

Jeez... well, at least you owned up to it pretty quick. There's this guy I know--I still don't know how much of what he ever said was true!

[purrtagonist]

Keeping the joke going for too long just makes it stale.

[hmmmm]

What sort of tall tales would he tell?

[liftoft]

Oh, y'know... he was the ultimate supreme leader with 10,000 members in his super secret evil organization, he couldn't taste flavors...basically every second word out of his mouth. He changed emotions every couple a seconds sometimes... that kinda shit.

[purrtagonist]

[. . . ah. . . huh]

Ultimate Supreme Leader. . .

[wait, there's another thing he's taking away from this]

When you said "again," did you mean you've been through a game styled like this before?

[except with MURDER which he will get to in a moment]

[liftoft]

Yeah. Basically exactly like this, except for how the dates happened. Same basic idea, though!

[purrtagonist]

[ah. . .]

So it wasn't a killing game.

[SORRY TO BRING THAT UP, B U T]

[liftoft]

W-What? No! It was--basically exactly like this...