pandatrash (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
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randangonpa2017-12-30 02:16 pm
pandatrash) wrote in randangonpa2017-12-30 02:16 pm
Day 10 - NEW FEAR'S EVE
THREE! TWO! ONE! HAPPPPPY NEW FEAR!
This is the last raccoon holiday for a while, so if you'd like a vacation from this murder game before the KILLING NIGHT, check your tablets! We'll even let you leave the campus, so you'd better praise our generosity!
[There's a new app on the tablets that cannot be removed. It will only activate when you are alone in your room, but click the cute carrot icon and you'll be given a simple prompt: "TAKE A VACATION?" with yes/no prompts. If you click "no," nothing happens; the app simply closes, ready for you to click on it again. But if you choose "yes," you'll become a bit lightheaded, and the next thing you know, you'll be back home. But not just any home: The home in which your murder carrot(s) (the best one, the newest one, or maybe even both of them? It's up to player discretion) has already been made reality. You'll be there for a full three hours before you're brought back to Nope's Peak, holding the tablet as if you never left. After that, the app will only say, "You know what to do."]
By the way, if it ain't obvious, that killing night is tonight! If you're thinking about doing a murder, rest assured: We will NOT let the dead mess up a trial like that again!
[In other news, the science lab has been restocked, and the raccoons made a HUGE mess eating out of the kitchen trash, like worse than usual.]
((Game nav
Day 10 Recyclr
Vacation time!
Trust sheets - get those submitted by tomorrow evening!))
This is the last raccoon holiday for a while, so if you'd like a vacation from this murder game before the KILLING NIGHT, check your tablets! We'll even let you leave the campus, so you'd better praise our generosity!
[There's a new app on the tablets that cannot be removed. It will only activate when you are alone in your room, but click the cute carrot icon and you'll be given a simple prompt: "TAKE A VACATION?" with yes/no prompts. If you click "no," nothing happens; the app simply closes, ready for you to click on it again. But if you choose "yes," you'll become a bit lightheaded, and the next thing you know, you'll be back home. But not just any home: The home in which your murder carrot(s) (the best one, the newest one, or maybe even both of them? It's up to player discretion) has already been made reality. You'll be there for a full three hours before you're brought back to Nope's Peak, holding the tablet as if you never left. After that, the app will only say, "You know what to do."]
By the way, if it ain't obvious, that killing night is tonight! If you're thinking about doing a murder, rest assured: We will NOT let the dead mess up a trial like that again!
[In other news, the science lab has been restocked, and the raccoons made a HUGE mess eating out of the kitchen trash, like worse than usual.]
((Game nav
Day 10 Recyclr
Vacation time!
Trust sheets - get those submitted by tomorrow evening!))
no subject
I think you either overestimate my tolerance for this or underestimate my determination in not being sober.
no subject
TIME TO SHOVE THOSE LEGS DOWN.]
If you'd only gotten yourself high, I still would've let you have alcohol! You've only got yourself to blame, and I'm not letting you hurt yourself drinking goddamn rubbing alcohol!
no subject
but lets his legs get shoved down and only makes a disgruntled face as the bottle's taken from him.
because he then just casually reaches up to dump his bowl of melting icecream on Ichigo's head.]
In either case, I would have only myself to blame. So why don't you keep that in mind for both situations?
no subject
He yelps as the icecream is dumped on his head because HOLY SHIT COLD?!]
What the hell?!
[He backs off, trying to wipe liquid ice cream out of his eyes.]
Agh - I keep it in mind, but it doesn't mean I agree with it! I'm not going to just ignore someone when they need help!
no subject
I decidedly do not need help.
[I am plenty comfortable in my garbage ways, THANK YOU VERY MUCH.]
no subject
Right, sure you do! It's not like you were going to die on the floor among a bunch of used q-tips before I found you!
no subject
So what if I did?
no subject
The hell do you mean, so what if you did?! You deserve to live like everyone else here, Dazai! Stop acting like you don't!
no subject
312 cases of extortion.
625 cases of fraud, along with other sundry crimes.
And that's only what the government knows so far.
[SO LIKE. YOU THOUGHT HE WAS A CRIMINAL FOR FUCKING MARIJUANA? SAY THAT SHIT TO HIS FACE AGAIN?]
no subject
gets him to pause a little, because holy shit -
But at the same time, Dazai said he was in the mafia earlier. A laundry list of crimes like that shouldn't really be shocking to him, and yet...
He shakes his head, actually looking angrier than before.]
So? Even if you've committed those crimes, you're not doing them here - and if you want to die so much to punish yourself for whatever you did in your past, don't. That's just running away from it!
[He reaches out, trying to grab Dazai's shirt to pull him closer.]
Try saving lives instead, to make up for whatever you've done, instead of looking for a way out of it!
no subject
wow
wow no
no no no no no no he's made such a terrible mistake.
and now he just wants to
fucking
drop
dead
outwardly, he doesn't do anything because the reality is that he doesn't really care about his bloody laundry list but those words leaves him practically dangling in Ichigo's grip, eyes bottomless and empty and just staring back at Ichigo because telling himself not to feel anything is better than any other reaction, really.]
no subject
D...Dazai...?
[He's never seen the man act like this before - even during the detox - but the real thing he can't look away from are those eyes, because they're so empty and hopeless -
No. No, he didn't want to do this to Dazai - he just wanted to help, to get him to stop wallowing in that pain he had because he knows what it feels like, but -
He's just...made it worse, hasn't he...?
He gently lets Dazai loose from his grip, his expression turning gradually more and more stricken and regretful as he takes a few steps back, torn between not wanting to leave Dazai alone in this state, but also wanting to run as far away as he can from the obvious sight of him turning someone he cared about into this horrible state with just his words.]
...
no subject
of course being this way would be alarming and unsettling.
naturally, revealing too much like this is too much.
so it's another moment of just sitting there before he shuts his eyes and takes a breath. pick up those pieces of mask that chipped off.]
... you're not wrong.
no subject
[He's silent for a moment, definitely not looking at Dazai.
Even if Dazai collects himself together again, Ichigo will still blame himself for making him get to that point, for forcing him into that reveal with his careless words.]
...I'm sorry, Dazai. I should've - I should've just...
[He trails off, not knowing what he was trying to say in the first place.]
...I just...I don't want to see you dead. You're...my friend. I care about you, even if you...
['Even if you don't care about yourself.']
no subject
but also easier to manage.
because, of course Ichigo doesn't know why this hits so hard.
he probably hasn't read the profiles still.
which means Dazai is calmly taking out his tablet so he can tab over to his own profile before holding it out for Ichigo.
it's so much easier than explaining it for himself.]
no subject
"Only decided to leave a life of crime as a Mafia Executive and become a detective who helps orphans because his dying friend suggested it."
He'd just - he'd just...trampled all over Dazai's heart thoughtlessly, due to his own ignorance and worry, and that knowledge...it hurts, because not only did he hurt a friend, he hurt him in a way that definitely strikes deep.
Ichigo's hands clutch at the fabric of his pants, lowering his head down to the point where Dazai can't see his face anymore, silent and still.
But it's obvious he's berating himself mentally, hitting himself over the head with his own stupid, thoughtless words that he thought would somehow help, why does he even try to help others when things like this happen -]
...
[So they both just sit in silence, suffering for different reasons.]
no subject
and that's why he's gonna pat the sad shounen on the head.]
Like I said. You're not wrong.
Sometimes I need the reminder.
no subject
...Yeah.
[He looks up a little, still looking...well, like shit, but he'll take it. Even if he suspects Dazai is just pulling himself together, he'll take it.
It does put the alcoholism and self-destructive behavior in perspective, though.]
...I'm going to have to take another shower because of you, you know.
[BECAUSE HIS HEAD'S A STICKY MESS, THANKS]
no subject
Make it a hot one.
[helpful advice.]
no subject
I will.
[He stands up to leave, and pauses.]
...It's alright if you get a drink from Akira. Just one, though.
no subject
Ichigo-kun.
Just to clarify... I don't really have any strong feelings one way or another about what I've done in the past. "Good" and "bad" aren't objective labels, you know. Though if I were given a label by society, it'd be decidedly "bad". And nothing I do will really change that.
[it's a futile struggle, in other words. but so is surviving when they're all going to die in the end, anyway. so it's more... why not struggle?
he shrugs a bit.]
My friend said something very similar to you. Probably even for the same reason. He knew I didn't care about "doing good" necessarily... but he said it might make me a better man than I was.
[but it's... really hard. okay? he's doing his best and his best is a drunken asshole stuck in a murder school and getting teenagers high and wishes he were dead like 90% of the time.]
no subject
I know. I don't know everything about your past, or why you were in the mafia. And I'm not going to make you tell me, because that's not my place. But...I can't believe that you're someone who's 'bad.'
[He's genuine as he speaks, a small smile spreading on his face.]
That's not the Dazai I've met so far. And if your friend felt anything like me, then...I want you to know that I'm confident he was right to think it would. It might not erase the past, but...you're still trying, and that's the most important part.
[Right, he's got to leave now, the ice cream is starting to dry and it feels super fucking gross on his scalp.]
See you around, Dazai.
no subject
he doesn't even have ice cream to eat now. 8((((]