randangonpa | Day 21, post-execution

Day 21, post-execution

[After a grisly execution, eight remain alive.]

FINALLY, we have some winners! Kaiba, Mae, and Minako can now claim their carrots, dismiss their sticks, and retire from the game, which means that there are only four players left! Congratulations!

[Canned noisemaker sounds and a confetti effect on the tablets. Finally, the nightmare is over... or so the particularly optimistic or desperate among you might think. But when the intercom starts playing nothing but obnoxious raccoon laughter that goes on for about five minutes straight, those hopes may seem a bit more distant. Finally, they calm down enough to continue their announcement:]

As we were saying, four players left! Which means...

You dumbasses! You total shit-for-brains morons! Did you even read the rules? You win the game when there are ten remaining! Ten!! How are you supposed to get to ten now when you only have like two thirds that many players? You’re so stupid! Learn to math, dipfucks!

[More laughter ensues.]

Anywho, we haven't forgotten we still owe you guys for catching all those killers, so you can have an entire week off with no killing nights at all! Winners, you're free to hang out during this time — have a vacation! We insist.

Meanwhile, we’re gonna help you out by bringing in some more contestants! Kick back and relax while we go find you some new friends!

Or... maybe some old ones?

[The raccoons continue to laugh until the transmission cuts out.]

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[MEANWHILE, STILL JUST, STABBING THE CABINET OVER HERE, until there's kind of a thunk noise and Mae emerges just holding up a square piece of wood over her head.]

Aha!

[why is Mae ever left to her own devices]

It had a false bottom.

[shoves herself right back into the cabinet, maybe there are more snacks???

and then, with the casual levity of someone who has never seen an action movie in her life before, never mind a little electric box-shaped thing with wires sticking out of it and a little analog clock on the screen:] Sooooo we've gooot ffffifteen, fourteen, thirteen seconds to figure out what this does.

[ Minako swings on down to look over Mae's shoulder and - yeah okay she's seen a lot of action movies and there's, um. IMMEDIATELY GRABS MAE BY THE BACK OF THE ROBES and drags her back while calmly and quietly screaming: ]

Kaiba can you disarm a bomb, it's always the red wire right??

[Why is it that new computers always seem to break the first day? Anyway, he's already up and opening the door, shit]

Not in ten seconds! Get out, now!

Ow, okay, okay—! [JUST KIND OF, GETTING DRAGGED ALONG, APPARENTLY, thank goodness for Minako because does Mae look like someone who knows what a bomb is because she is not] I'm going I'm going what's going on!

[ten seconds will probably not get them the entire way down the passageway but it'll at least get them out of here]

[hey so remember that thing where all of this was made of wood

because when the bomb blows it somehow takes pretty much the whole first half of the passageway with it just in the first go, shrapnel fun for everyone, which is impressive enough before factoring in how the hall very rapidly starts catching on fire]

[ This is happening, this sure is happening, why is there a bomb, there's some intense pain going on but she can still run and hey if everything's exploding behind her at least she won't end up losing an eye like some people. Look on the bright side here ]

I HATE THIS SCHOOL

[ Also on the bright side: she has a lot of hair so when the end of it catches on fire there's a long way for it to go before it'll hit the scalp ]

[The problem with being used to wearing a sweet kevlar-lined impact-resistant fireproof heroic dragon coat is that if you happen to have messed yours up while murdering a kid, later when you're inevitably caught in an explosion, that replacement jacket is gonna feel that much more disappointing as it goes up like a runny pair of nylons as the remains of off-brand snacks and old computers and other sharp and/or fiery things go raining down atop it. Still, stopping, dropping, and rolling will have to wait until out of the hallway at least, and Kaiba staggers towards the exit, taking care that the girls have made it out]

[OH OKAY SO THIS IS WHAT'S GOING ON!!! SHE'LL THANK MINAKO FOR DRAGGING HER AROUND WHEN SHE'S LESS KIND OF ON FIRE, THANKS, honestly she's been set on fire before but usually fire takes her resistance stat into consideration and this fire isn't. she shrieks, almost falls down but just manages to grab onto Minako, and tries to grab onto Kaiba and yank him through the exit on the way.

bbbbut the fire is spreading down the passageway and the entire library is also pretty much exactly as flammable as all the wood behind it so the fuckin scooby murder game better hightail it out of here, too]

[ Minako manages to avoid stumbling and causing a deadly pileup in the doorway, she's beauty she's grace ~~she's got shrapnel in her face~~, it's not good even so, it's uh kind of on fire in here, this isn't ideal, did they fuck up or what, there'd better not have been the good clues back there, she didn't exactly write them down, there was something about a mirror??

LATER THO this conga line is going right the fuck out through all these flaming books ]

Edited 2018-02-02 02:36 (UTC)

[Yeah, the books are at least damp enough to take slightly more time to turn into Dante's Inferno thanks to the flood the previous day, though it's still a delicious mix of carbon monoxide and charred offal scent, so there's not even a point in hiding near the pinyano to catch a breath as it is literally poison. So ignoring whatever is definitely freshly sticking out of his back like a really unwieldy splinter, Kaiba tosses whoever's closest out the door to safety--neither of them are much bigger than his brother, so it's fine--and shoves the other through before skedaddling out himself.

...hopefully they didn't use up all the Dora bandages the other day]

[okay well any amount of throwing/shoving is about the end of what Mae can deal with here so out the fucking door and onto the floor she goes, which is way better than being on fire but still less than ideal just as far as situations a person could be in are.

coughing, she rolls over exactly enough to get the end of one of her pigtails to stop burning, which really only agitates all the cookie crumbs and probably also wood crumbs, that's what those are called for sure, lodged in her side—her leg is not on fire but preeeetty nicely burned and is the wound in her side bleeding again?? it is, great

at Top Fuckingest Volume, more so than usual, partially because her ears are still ringing:] SO THAT WAS FUN.

[it wasn't]

How are we—ow, crap, Minako? Kaiba? Please tell me neither of you are dying.

[ Minako has a nice soft landing (on Mae), rubs her eyes, because smoke happened and they're stinging and she can't rub her back which is also stinging. Probably for the best?? She was in front so she had two human shields but still. There's a lot of stuff in there it would be a good idea not to rub in OH WAIT stop drop and roll (off Mae) forget not rubbing stuff into the back her hair's on fire and so's the back of her shirt by extension. ]

WHO JUST LEAVES BOMBS AROUND

[ Something may have rebounded at some point? Her chin hurts, could this be the end of Minako Aino's beautiful face ]

Nobody dies I'm not allowing it, dying is bullshit

[is dead]

[wait no, that hum is tinnitus and that bright light is just the normal lights now that they aren't in a dark room full of fire and the warmth is from the flames on his slightly conflagrated and hole-y shitty replacement coat, which he will deal with once he's finished coughing up a lung, probably]

Fucking Minesweeper...

[okay neat good to know everyone is accounted for, even if being accounted for means SOMEBODY jamming limbs into her wounds while rolling off of her and goddamn it she's caught some of Minako's fire so Mae has to ROLL OVER SOME MORE and AGITATE HER NEW WOUNDS, AND HER OLD ONE, AND PLEASE SHE NEEDS A NAP SO FUCKING BAD]

I have no idea what happened, I don't know what any of that was, I— [WHEEEEEZE and she tries to sit up and pretty immediately collapses back onto the floor.

breathlessly, after and between some coughing:] Are we all done being on fire now.

[ Sneezes. Ash comes out. Grooooss. ]

We'd better be, I'm too pretty to be on fire any more than this!

...We're all pretty. We're all gorgeous and we're going to not be on fire and we're all going to live, is that too much to ask?! If you hadn't found that thing, we'd have been blown to bits! I thought we were done with stupid games!!

[ Getting steadily more raspy and more indignant as she goes ]

Of course not. We're still here, aren't we?

[before he can get ramped up into some righteously indignant and/or terribly upset speech of his own, he starts hacking up his other lung, so decides to just focus on patting out the last of the flames on his jacket instead. Eventually:]

...Come on.

Can finding the thing absolve me of opening the stupid hall up in the first place? Can we call it even?

[please she was doing so well at not having any of her friends die for like, four whole days!! and now she sets them on fire!!! she's upset!!!!]

Minako, you're right, you're so right, we're bea— [COUGH COUGH HACK] Okay yeah so this is definitely the Earth Mother reminding me I messed up, which, fair, but, [HACK HACK] Gods we just wrapped this again, unbelievable, can we just, can I just, can this just, you guys.

[she's just sort of unhappily rapidfire mumbling to herself while also kind of rolling around on the floor making attempts to stand and giving up halfway through.

and then, clearer, kind of just yelling towards the floor while still half-lying down and trying to push herself up with her arms here:] WE'RE GOING TO BE FINE.

[falls back down]

The nurse's office is two floors doooowwwwn.

[she's...she's getting up]

Uuugh, who's the next best nurse who isn't me or dead.

I bet it's McGonagall and she's gonna juuuuudge us. [ More than she already might for all the murder, uuuugh, she definitely can't text her to come pick them up, mostly because she's already blown her text for the day and also because Minako fuckin' Aino doesn't need to text any mother figures she's too cool ]

I don't wanna tell McGonagall about this, I don't wanna take the stairs, let's just agree that Kaiba owes us his life double nowww.

[ not too cool to crawl to the elevator. slowly, hand over hand, like she's in a far side cartoon about being lost in the desert ]

If there's a bomb in the elevator what's the plan, I don't trust elevators not to pull anything shady.

After this? One life debt is enough.

[which is the same amount as before but shhhh. In the meantime, gets to his feet through the power of spite and stubborn pride; no bets on how long he'll stay there but there is no goddamn way he is letting any of those non-murdering assholes see him like this so he staggers down the right direction.]

...If there's a bomb in the elevator we celebrate that we don't have to deal with not having anyone with formal medical training. Otherwise, we take care of it ourselves.

[not thinking about the rest]

I'm pretty sure if whatever that was happens in the elevator, the plan is just to die.

[ooookay well she's leaning real heavily against the wall, and also bleeding on it now, but she's slowly...making...progress...... the occasional pained squeak comes out of her but she's gotta make it to the elevator somehow!! everyone worth asking for help is already here!!! fuck this]

Let's just... Look, we're gonna be fine, w-we can probably figure it out? I've been set on fire better, but—Minako, do...you want a hand up?

[trailing off as she realizes how much she is not in shape to provide one, but, but, but. but

someone who isn't her is responsible for elevator button pressing though because look what the fuck happened behind the last door she opened???]

[ Crawling isn't actually that comfortable considering it involves, you know, moving her arms around, pulling at all the stuff in her back, whatever, nothing's gonna feel great and it's not like she's gonna make either of them drag her with the shape they're in! ]

I'm committed to the aesthetic, Mae.

[ Also she's not sure she's capable of walking now that the immediate fuckery and peril has gone by but whatever, Akira managed to walk off whatever happened with him and so it's not worth worrying these two about it! ]

This wasn't great fire, though, I'm going to complain to the newspapers, or the front desk - is better fire less deadly or more deadly, I can't tell with you.

[ Is she going to engage in shitty banter all the slow painful way to the infirmary? Damn right she is. The Minako will continue until morale improves. ]

[yup, see, ~~dragging oneself zombie-like down the hall~~ walking is a much better idea. just turn that pain into anger and let that rage power you, that is the kaiba way. that's why he is ready! to grouchily press all of the buttons! wow this is unpleasant.]

...Aino, if you need a hand up, just say something. Who knows what you'll catch crawling around on the floor like that.

And a better fire is a lot more deadly. If this fire even somewhat knew what it was doing, none of us would even have eyebrows left. This was just lazy work. If whoever made this was making bombs for me, they'd be fired.

[some people??? use shitty banter???? to cope?????????]

Probably can't catch anything worse than on fire...

[thank god for elevator handrails though, things that aren't walls to lean on, technology is amazing, this is probably supporting her enough that she can actually reach down and physically offer Minako a hand? she's going to regret this she knows it already]

I didn't ask for a debate about fire quality, being set on fire is a better experience overall when it hurts less, that's all I was trying to s— [coughs some more, then, wheezing,] This is the stupidest semantics conversation I've ever had.

Is fire contagious?? Can't I get a shot for that, I'm not a fan of shots but this is even worse than the flu.

[ We're putting the antics in semantics. Minako manages to be helped up/crawl up Mae's leg like ivy going up a trellis, it's a disaster but she's gonna end it standing. ]

...Kaiba do you have a lot of people making bombs for you or what, what's that company even do.

Children's entertainment.

[congratulations on becoming upright. we are halfway to our goal]

Day 21, post-execution

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